The thing about expressing real feelings online

25 Jun

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The thing about expressing real feelings online is that it makes other people uncomfortable. We’re not used to honesty when it comes to the dark parts of life or ourselves and so when others reveal it we either rejoice that someone is speaking truth or we wonder what’s wrong with them.

The thing about expressing real feelings online is that you will get concerned people reaching out to you. Some of them will wonder what you have to be sad or anxious or worked up about. Others will say they’re sorry.

It’s OK. You’ll say. That’s how I was feeling at that moment, not anymore.

The thing about expressing real feelings online is that you’re expressing one moment of a much larger, more complicated life. This is how I feel right now. Most likely it is not how I’ll feel in a day, or an hour, or even ten minutes, but writing it out, finding the truth in it is helpful to some of us. And so we do it.

The thing about expressing real feelings online is some people won’t get it. They’ll overreact to you saying, “This is how I feel” by saying “Oh no! I’m so sorry you’re so unstable and (INSERT UNQUALIFIED MENTAL HEALTH DIAGNOSIS) and here’s some unsolicited advice!” There’s nothing you can say to those people.

The thing about expressing real feelings online is that our gut instinct tells us to tie it up in a pretty bow. To write about a problem and neatly resolve it at the end of 500 words so other people feel better. But this is not a movie, this is not a story. This is life.

The thing about expressing real feelings online is it will draw others to you. Some people will relate to what you’re saying and they’ll reach out and you’ll connect over your shared humanity. They’ll express their real feelings and you’ll express yours and you’ll remember why it is, again, that you do all this expressing in the first place.

The thing about expressing real feelings online is that you’re expressing real feelings online.

The world is a much more complicated place.

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5 Responses to “The thing about expressing real feelings online”

  1. Kay June 25, 2017 at 11:21 pm #

    Very true!

  2. Rachel Del June 26, 2017 at 6:48 am #

    “The thing about expressing real feelings online is that our gut instinct tells us to tie it up in a pretty bow. To write about a problem and neatly resolve it at the end of 500 words so other people feel better. But this is not a movie, this is not a story. This is life.”

    YESSSSSS. There is this blog that I used to read (it’s very popular now) and I still love the message, but I had to stop reading it because every post ends on a positive note–with a positive spin. It’s actually in their submission rules that the story must end with a message of hope, etc. Well, that’s great, but that’s not always the way life works!!

    Bravo for this post!

    • jillianlorraine July 7, 2017 at 7:51 pm #

      Thank you! I’m curious the popular blog now…

  3. Linnea June 26, 2017 at 11:14 pm #

    ❤️ Your blog is one that always helps me feel like I find shared humanity.

    • jillianlorraine July 7, 2017 at 7:50 pm #

      :) :) :)

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