Selfies: The Agony And The Ecstasy

17 Oct

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I have a couple of items of important business for you on this fine Friday afternoon.

1. I only have one smelly armpit.  Lena Dunham mentioned this same condition in her book, and it made me feel a bit more normal, but it also made me wonder, do we all only have one smelly armpit?  Is this just something we never talk about because we are trying to be polite and appropriate? (Please check your pits and report back in the comments, thank you.)

2. Other things people don’t talk about: female facial hair.

3. Other things I want to talk about: Scandal.  Why am I only so-so about this show?  I enjoy it.  But I don’t ENJOY IT WANT TO SCREAM IT FROM THE ROOFTOPS ENJOY IT and it’s weird for me because what does enjoy it with a lowercase e even mean?  I’m not that person.

OK then.

Last thing.

Most important thing.

Self Magazine.

I’m working with Self Magazine this year!  Do you see that button to your right? The pink and black little banner thing that says Self Made Collective when you scrolllllll up? That banner proclaims to the world that I’m working with Self Magazine this year.

This means you’ll be seeing my articles on their website and various other fun things.  It also means you get this blog post with my selfie outtakes! And this Instagram with me talking about why I’m #SelfMade.  Let’s pull it up, shall we?

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Hey! My first ever Instagram selfie and it’s all thanks to the new @selfmagazine. I am #SELFMade because I have crazy big dreams and I (rather dramatically) pursue them. Also because I made Rice Krispie Treats by myself today.

Whew.  Seeing that again brings up a lot of anxiety.  I don’t know how you do it, people who just take casual selfies, but the morning I took this selfie I had a panic attack, paced around my roommate’s bed, and questioned all of which I know in this world.  Why do people take selfies? Should I go with duck face?  Do I need professional acne help?

WHAT’S WITH THE LIGHTING IN THIS ROOM?

Is my discomfort taking selfies a feminist issue?

Why can other people just take easy, breezy, beautiful selfies?

It was agony, I tell you.

And then it was ecstasy.

Because after I posted the selfie people were kind.  And supportive.  And that was nice.

It was a very confusing time for me.

Almost as confusing as my armpit situation.

Armpit sitch.

So!  Bringing it back, bringing it back, SCREAMING IT FROM THE ROOFTOPS THAT I’M BRINGING IT BACK, here’s the deal. There’s an Instagram contest going on right now with Self.  Share how you’re #SELFMade on Instagram and you could win a trip to Hawaii from Self Magazine.  (More details here.)

(I’ve never been to Hawaii and this suddenly seems dreadfully unfair.)

(Do we think I will win the contest?)

(Unrelated but crucial, when is the appropriate time for me to reenact Olivia Pope’s monologue, “THAT IS WHAT I DO AND THERE IS NO ONE BETTER IN THE ENTIRE WORLD AT IT THAN I AM”?)

Questions, questions.

Thoughts, thoughts.

I’m signing off now and getting some pasta salad. I suggest you do the same.

May your weekend be bright and full of selfies (or not) and Scandal (or not).  Either way, I’m here for you.

PS: Girlfriend selfies, aka the only selfies I know how to take.

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6 Responses to “Selfies: The Agony And The Ecstasy”

  1. jenn from much to my delight October 18, 2014 at 3:45 am #

    All I noticed was fabulous hair and white teeth in those selfies. A success, in my book.

  2. Esther October 21, 2014 at 8:50 am #

    haha! selfies are a hard thing to handle, that´s for sure. Yesterday was a tough day and all I could manage to post on IG was a picture of my t-shirt from the neck down (thankfully, no armpit stench was found…for now)

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