In Which I Almost Encounter Bono, Again

20 May

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For those of you concerned that my blog has turned into a Bono fan site where every day from now until forever I quote U2 and talk about how I maybe, sort of, almost should have run into Bono and I’ll never recover because I didn’t, all I have to say is:

Your fears are founded in reality.

I’m renaming this site jillianlorraineandbono.com.

I just purchased red sunglasses and am wearing them indoors.

**How long must we sing this song, how long, how long**

Last Saturday was a long, hot, need-to-recover-in-a-dark-room sort of day.  It was Caitlin’s graduation and a tip top occasion, but really a tip top tiring occasion as well.  I spent most of my time fighting traffic in and out of Malibu, sitting in the hot sun, and other such graduation things.

Graduations!  Important, but also! You know?

Saturday night my boyfriend and I were supposed to go out and socialize with some friends.  Drinks on the water.  Happiness and self-actualization.  LA, etc.  I stumbled over to his apartment around 8:00 and said I couldn’t do it. I was far too tired and needed to stay in and drink a glass of water and take three ibuprofen and eat ice cream and watch Veep in a dark room all night.

“That sounds like your equivalent of a bender,” he said, as he got me water and watched me eat a pint of ice cream.  ”I’ll miss you.”

“Of course you will,” I said, “now go and leave me to my misery.”

A couple of hours later he sent me a text, “One word: Bono.”

Naturally, I remained the classy girl I am, “BONO IS NOT THERE, IS HE? I WILL COME.  WHAT ARE YOU SAYING? YOU DON’T SAY BONO AND DISAPPEAR! WHY ARE YOU JUST TELLING ME THIS NOW? I COULD BREAK UP WITH YOU OVER THIS.”

“I told you as soon as I knew,” he said, which, my dear blog readers, was the honest-to-goodness truth.  Sweet, terrible-taste-in-music boy that he is, he didn’t know Paul David by sight.

!

On the one hand that’s kind of really cute, and the other hand, pull it together, man.

Pull it freaking together.

“Inform me of his every move. I’ll be there ASAP,” I texted and I was out the door, hurtling towards my destiny.  I cranked “Sunday Bloody Sunday” and frantically called Hilary six times.  You see, while I respect Bono as the greatest person alive, as all normal people do, Bono is Hilary’s diva.  Her soul person.

Bono is to her what Mariah Carey is to me.

Plus I was just having a lot of feelings.

All of the feelings.

Feelings everywhere, spilling out, needing to be shared.

A couple of minutes later I got a text from another friend in our group informing me phones were dying and Bono was leaving.

“No!!!!!” I responded, still a full 20 minutes away from Malibu, still a full 20 minutes from my destiny.

“How can this keep happening, my close encounters of the Bono kind?  Why am I so cursed?  Was I born under an unlucky star, is that what this is all about?”

!

A few hours later I was back in bed with my Veep and my water when my boyfriend texted me, phone functional once more.  I apologized for my rash words and asked him seriously if we could continue in a relationship.

How does it work, really, when one of you has been in the presence of Bono and one hasn’t?  Can we still communicate?  Do we have anything in common anymore?  What does our future look like?

“I love you, Jill,” he said.  ”I love your crazy.”

“Yeah?” I said.

“Yeah,” he said.

And then I thought, oh.

That’s how it works.

That’s what our future looks like.

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3 Responses to “In Which I Almost Encounter Bono, Again”

  1. Cheri @ Overactive Blogger May 21, 2014 at 1:26 pm #

    Oh…my…God….this is nuts. And SO something that I would do.

    Except, replace Bono with Michael Jackson, Gavin Degraw, or Demi Lovato.

  2. Linnea May 21, 2014 at 1:26 pm #

    I think your boyfriend needs a blog nickname. I refuse to let you be *that* girl who constantly says, “My boyfriend” “My boyfriend” – there was a girl like that in high school and I just wanted to kick her.

    Of course, you are too far away geographically for me to kick, so if you still want to say “my boyfriend” a lot there won’t be any consequences.

    Sorry about Bono. Your celebrity luck is being saved for Mariah Carey sightings – that’s all.

    • jillianlorraine May 21, 2014 at 1:34 pm #

      I know! I’ve been having this name debate myself. It really throws off my writing. I’m not one for cutesy nicknames, though. Sigh. I don’t know the answer.

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